I've always known that God is just an excuse for all the evils in the world, my father taught me that. He told me that whenever something bad happens, something we didn't plan for or wanted, we can always blame it on fate saying "the lord works in mysterious ways".
Being certain of that is a mixed blessing. It means you can be in control of your own destiny, but also that there is no afterlife. And then what?
Yesterday S joined us as we were going out. Just looking at her I could see she's beginning to have the same insight, but without the darker side. She only wants to enjoy life and not be afraid of how she will be judged or rejected in heaven. She looked amazing on the dance floor, as if she had done it her whole life; flirting with the boys, moving like an angel in a twirling skirt. I hope she never starts thinking about what happens when we're all gone.
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